The Crab Mech is a wondrous piece of lost dwarven technology in the shape of a crab designed for submersible travel underwater. It's internal workings are unknown, but it has a distinct, steampunk-ish look to it. Cullith Cascadia of the Storm's Convergence or one of her underlings happened upon this submersible and stored it away in a warehouse, under lighter guard so as not to draw suspicion. The Unexpectables learned of it's location, dealt with the guards and also a sudden demonic incursion, and then took the mech out into the open sea, where they learned how to use it by trial and error and occasional impulsive button pressing.
The "Crabmarine" met its end after a very eventful trip where it was hit by one of Cullith's lightning bolts, struck by her greatsword, attacked by her callatas, bounced down a ravine to crushing ocean depths, and finally ejected to the surface by a magical water geyser. Once on the surface, the Crabmarine entered an error recovery state where it marched straight towards land and got wedged between a pair of trees. It then exploded in a mess of shrapnel in a detonation that only Zenrio saw because he was the only one who wasn't cool enough to walk away from the explosion.
Control Panel Edit
1-5 are weapons systems.
6-9 are movement controls.
10-22 are utility functions.23 is The Crank.
- Crab Launcher - needs to be charged before firing otherwise the ports just open and the crabs wander out.
- Frickin' Lasers - apparently has a recharge time or procedure before they can be fired again
- Launches a series of 6 torpedoes. Ammo capacity is unknown.
- Ink "smoke screen"
- Side arms retract - then as a reaction they rocket propel out and then retract via chains. Uses weapon charge dial.
- Move Forward
- Rotates mech counterclockwise
- Move Backwards
- Changes Facing - up, down, left, right. Allows the operator to change view
- Reloads Crab-based weapons
- Interior cabin light toggle
- Initiates audio recording. Whatever is said is loud, in dwarvish, lasts for an hour and 20 minutes, and will repeat if button is pressed during playback. It will never be known what was said.
- Surrounds the hull with a purplish glow that acts as a protective force shield
- Opens the hatch, regardless whether the crab is underwater or not
- Smooth Jazz plays inside the cabin. This jazz changes in intensity during combat
- Toggles exterior lights
- External Megaphone that loudly broadcasts anything said inside the cabin
- Sonar display in the form of a 3-dimensional transparent illusion
- Jump - can be boosted for larger jumps
- Reveals cupholders
- Nose Button: when pressed the entire vehicle shook and horrible noises were heard like metal grinding on metal. This button had no function other than making noise.
- Booster - adds stored energy to the next system activated
- The Crank provides the power source for the machine. By turning the crank the clockwork mechanisms are charged. The crank can only be turned so far. Borky is good at crank duty.
- There is some debate whether or not Monty changed the functions of certain buttons in the long break between episodes 70 and 71. Everyone agrees whether it was cast confusion or her subterfuge, the result was absolutely hilarious.
- The only party member that took notes on the buttons was GaijinGoombah.
- The Blood of Gnash orcs salvaged what remnants they could of the mech and have used it to make crude armor for themselves and their war aurochs.